Things have settled into a steady pace now. My medications seem to be working their magic by keeping me stable and sane. No great expectations but conversely no deep depression. It feels like the best things could possibly be. Maybe its just a beautiful summers day that helps. Maybe it is spending less time thinking […]
One of the byproducts of childhood sexual abuse is the self-care piece. It’s paying attention to and investing in good health and practices. I am legendary for not taking care of myself, whether its minding what I eat and drink to simple health maintenance. Today I am living with a very specific issue and that […]
This year has two stories that have consumed the media, Coronavirus and George Floyd. Important, yes, but deserving of all the attention, no. You see, when you make something THE story you ignore many other important topics. For me it is childhood sexual abuse. This is an anathema for me that it goes unreported and […]
It saps you of the strength to accomplish anything. Let alone get up off your back and try. I don’t have the ability to say more, I am exhausted.
I am surrounded by things I have put value on. My guitars, my stereo and records, my clothes, my electronics, all of it. Like you, I know that these things don’t provide anything tangible in the way of lasting joy, peace, satisfaction, and security. Yet I pile them up in a vain attempt to fill voids, […]
Relevance. In a world that goes from disaster to calamity to outrage how can we as simple individuals find relevance? In isolation there is a degree of safety but along with that is a distinct lack of connection. My connections are severely limited, but in closer proximity to people I have found misunderstanding, offense, ambivalence. […]
I have never abused drugs or alcohol and never intend too, but I sure would like to medicate these feelings away. If I had some positive thoughts it would be nice, something to look forward to but I don’t. My life is pretty much behind me now. Maybe I should look at it like that…whats […]
It always feels like another shoe is going to drop. There isn’t any extended peace or joy. I live on the edge of something I cannot describe but it isn’t a pleasant place to be. All good is temporary and the pain is the tie that binds. I don’t feel like I belong, anywhere I […]
The Coronavirus Pandemic has done a lot of things to a lot of people during the last few months. I was on the brink of busting out of a long, dark period of life. Hopes renewed and motivated to get after it again. I was in first gear and accelerating, but now I am back […]
